when close friends are sent to war

i almost died a couple of times last night driving home from the inflatable supermodels show in fairfax at 1am way past my bedtime. i kept looking around going, gosh. why is it so dark? and then remembering that my eyes were dilated from an earlier trip to the eye doctor that self-same day. plus the roads were wet and i did a little fishy tail all over an on ramp between freeway junctions. but that was as nothing compared to the horror i felt 2 days prior upon learning that one of my good friends from college, miss lindsay “pizza rice” baynes was being activated from the reserves and deployed.

she left this message on my phone that was like, “deployed. this week. phone being turned off. call me back really soon.” all amongst scary little sob-catching noises. and i panicked! i called erica immediately and told jason and jenny by email the next day.

i tried to call her back at lunch–no go. i then called when i got home from work and managed to learn the semi-relieving news that she wasn’t leaving the country, yet, she was just being activated but kept at a base here in the US somewhere for now. she couldn’t say where though because apparently it’s classified till she gets there or something. wierd.

it’s nice to know that she’s not being sent to iraq or korea at the moment but there’s still that potential and that’s worrisome. i worry at it like a sore tooth. i think, ‘goddamm what if we really do go to war and the shit economy becomes even shittier and lindsay is in the huge-non-fun-playing-sandpit-not-of-our-youths wth guns and and bombs?’ and then i’m tempted to go to the march tomorrow but am still generally against marches and rain and also getting up early. because i don’t believe in anything enough or long enough to care enough to do anything about it.

i did however expend the energy to learn about military blogs. because that was stimulating. my favorite is this one by lieutenant smash but you can find more from this article on them at msnbc.