Nyotaimori

i know it’s taken me forever to write about this. but i’ve been sooo busy. christmas was good. there was a lot of shit going on while at the same time nothing was going on at all there was just so many people around constantly that it seemed like a constant chaos. so but what do i really have to talk about in relation to christmas?

welll…..candy cane communication devices for one. see one of my uncles (the eldest) got very drunk and decided that a candy cane hooked around his ear was really a walkie talkie and was contacting people left and right and hollering things like, “dave to adam! come in adam! can you hear me all right?” to which my brother would invariably reply something along the lines of, “what’s that dave? you’re breaking up. i think there may be a crack in your earpiece.” and sure enough broken candy cane bits would in fact be causing some spillage for the cellophane wrapper.

my cousin kevin got lost, mainly based on the fact that WE LEFT HIM BEHIND at the ice rink. the guilt i felt at the moment when his mom said, “where’s kevin?” while we were all sitting down for dinner….ah shit, dood. it was practically heart-wrenching. i was like, “ah kevin? he’s …..he’s…..oh holy crap. we forgot him.” “you what?” she said. “we forgot him. at the ice rink.. uh….oops.” 5 minutes later amidst the clatter of dishes and people laughing and talking and still no kevin in sight, i had to stand up, put all my outer garments back on and disappear back into the fucking blizzard (all right i’m exaggerating) with a muttered, “we left kevin!” i went to look for him for the next hour. admittedly, not without help. as i hadn’t made it more then like 30 feet before katherine came running out behind me calling that mary was coming and we all walked all over sunriver yelling for kevin. my brother, (after eating dinner) came out and putted around on the motorbike on the golf course looking for him too. everytime katherine and i would be like, “well i bet he’s made it back NOW.” and we’d go back to the house and walk in and ask if he was back yet and they would all look at us and go “nope, haven’t seen him.” and we’d go “shit!” and go back outside. back and forth and thru the woods and down the fairway and back up the street and around the roundabout and to the village and back from the village spread out going different ways. i even went in the men’s bathroom to check if he had fallen and hit his head on the edge of the urinal and was unconscious and bleeding or something. but no. no. just lost and wandering somewhere else. as we found out when we did eventually find his NINETEEN year old ass. sheesh. it’s a sad day when someone who’s almost 20 can’t find their way in out of the cold.

we went drinking to the deschutes brewery in bend. where adam and jeff got some really cool growlers of mirror pond. and james once again brought up my webpage in ordinary conversation. james. you just….you just don’t speak about the webpage. i don’t know what it is. but…even though i write here and am all out in the open and the like. it’s not as if i want people to be reading it necessarily. or….at least not people i don’t know. though i was pretty pleased that katherine called it “funny.” hee. katherine thinks i’m funny. but back to the james thing. ok once he was saying something to adam about the webpage and i was like, “aaaah shut up!” because adam doesn’t read the webpage and i don’t really want him reading it. i’m still not sure how i feel about you relatives reading it. especially porn. you shouldn’t be reading porn. that just ain’t right. i’m not really explaining myself very well here. it could be because i’m tired. blech. new year’s sleepiness. but more about that later i guess cause i’ve got to go entertain the marina houseguest now. =)

quick things though:

i got this wobbly head piggy thing from jeff in my stocking. that was sweet.

i got the same necklace that doug gave me as a first year anniversary present from my mother for christmas. talk about ironic.

we played a drinking game with a christmas story. which would have been more fun if i was more awake at the time.

i was a fashion designer briefly.

i had a lot of fun.

i ice-skated.

i helped pick out the tree.

i watched bootmen. don’t ask.

this was me three christmases ago. could i be so lucky to give makeovers to unsuspecting horrendously hung-over relatives again on christmas morning? we can always hope.

merry christmas everybody!

things are shaping up for the drive up to oregon. i’ve got me some snow tire chains. i have no presents for my family members other than a wine cozy for my aunt mary. i’m not packed. i’m not prepared. i’m skeptical about getting a room with a door, even if i’m willing to share with my mom and mary. and most horrific of all i will not have internet access for a whole week. i might shrivel up. maybe i’ll drop a pound or two based on the jitters. (no big loss.) maybe i’ll start chattering my teeth uncontrollably. maybe i’ll spasm and froth and be all in all a pitiful sight to behold. maybe they’ll give me my own room out of horrified sympathy. here’s to hoping. i love my family. i do. i love going to oregon for christmas. but more than three–three? i mean two–days trapped in the same house and i start to go a little crazy. the cabin fever pressure is going to boil up. the lack of weblog outlet is going to stifle me. i’m scared. i’m anticipatorily nervous for my sanity.

i wonder if anyone will miss me. i mean…have you gotten used to my millions of posts a week/day/morning? do you even care? will my absence make a difference? i guess we shall see. but i imagine everybody will be so busy with their own holidays affairs that no one will be on CH that much. and besides, i’m sure i’ll be sending postcards from SunRiver.

secret shhh…

i just posse-ed myself over to lunch with tracy, ian, marc, shannon, and janie (jamie?). it was fun! i was too broke to buy myself lunch and they kept trying to force me to take their money and ian rolled food over the table at me and then made me laugh while i was trying to surreptiously eat it without being noticed by the waiter.

and then i came back to work and katie (crate) was asking me what i’d eaten for lunch. ahem.

“so what’d you eat for lunch.”

“um i didn’t…i don’t have any money.”

“oh…but…uh…who did you go with?”

“my friend tracy who works over in the french dept and her husband and our friend marc and two of thier friends from where they work.”

“so you couldn’t charge the food?”

“nah. i ate too much chocolate anyway. whatevs yo. they’re all over 30 too and like to toss thier money around and kept offering to pay but i was like ‘no no is all right.”

“you hang out with 30 year olds?”

(this from a 28 year old.)

“um…yeah.”

“huh.”*

“yeah.”

it’s funny how people are always a little shocked when i mention knowing 30 year olds. i wonder if the 30 year olds have issues with people when they mention hanging out with 20 year olds. is that not the same thing i wonder? i don’t think it is really. but i wait to hear from my 30 year olds. who are not mine a’tall mind, but wholly their own.

holy crap. so then katie was like, “i’m hungry let’s get chinese!” and i was like, “uhhhh…all right. i could charge it i guess.”** and then our boss was having these 2 people from santa cruz up for a meeting and they were kind of feeling peckish and so now i have this HUGE FUCKING PLATE OF FOOD for FREE! yeah lunch meeting! mmmmm orange beef and pot stickers…..so freeeeee…….i am a lucky goose. goooooossse……

*implicit in the “huh.” is the layered question, “what for?”

**which should not be any kind of indication on me not eating with youse guys at the other place. i really wasn’t too hungry then and i didn’t want you to have to pay. and using credit cards is a hassle. and….um…yeah. but i was so so happy to come and sit. and with the laughing and snorting of rice.

so last night at midnite premiere kristen and i had a communal revelation about the seriousness draw power of the boy in a beanie. kristen judged this to be because boy hair is normally bad and beanie’s hide that from us. i think it has something to do with making thier heads all round and fuzzy and smooth. or something. hmm…that is pretty sexually telling. it also frames thier faces really nicely if they have nice faces. cute boys in cute beanies of the indie rock persuasion are hot. that’s all i’m saying. and i was bored. and tired. and wonder if you agree.

boy in beanie-hot or not? fucking hot. hot enough to fuck. ugly. stupid. condom-head. think it adds extra protection for fucking. think you are seriously deranged for finding young beanie wearers really hot. wish you had a boy in a beanie with you right now. think michele has really odd fetishes. were wishing this quiz was not quite as long. wish that michele had made a real entry instead of some dumb beanie poll. wish you had seen some the cuties in beanies at midnight LOTR. bean-ie! bean-ie! throw your hands in the air, wave em like… wish michele would shove a beanie in her mouth, choke, and die. (you choose this. no forgiveness.) think SDK looked hot in a beanie. wish michele had slept with SDK and gotten the sick fascination out of her system. think michele and SDK would have made a cute couple. think michele has veered away from original poll question. beanie boy! beanie boy! give me joy! i like poi!

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