take that baby-maker! i bite your ass off! AR AR AR
“Jacob, when Jesus (note: don’t look at this at work.) created the world, he made seven full days. He gave one to Wednesday and He gave one to Thursday, so they wouldn’t fight. What’s the conflict?”
wise words, friend Jason. Wise words indeed. Bible-Thumper.
With Michele in this fateful hour
I call on Heaven with its power
And the wind which is kite-able
And my ass which is bite-able
And Sir Anthony Hopkins who is knight-able…
Ironically, giving Wednesday and Thursday different days just made them fight even more. Because everyone knows that Wednesday is also called “Hump Day”, while Thursday is known as “the day that doesn’t have a name because it comes between Hump Day and Friday so no one really cares about it”. But even if Thursday *did* have a good name, it still would be jealous of Wednesday’s Hump Day. Because who wouldn’t be jealous of humping?
i don’t think i want to know about wednesday’s humping activities.
what about the poem? monday’s child is full of grace and so on? thursday has some specialness then doesn’t it?
goddamm it. i am in film class chat right now and they are attacking me again. it’s incredible. do they just not understand clever insights? are my insights less than clever? is my teacher dumb if no one else seems to think he is? it’s hard to say.
Monday’s child is full of grace
Tuesday’s child is fair of face
Wednesday’s child (me) is full of woe
Thursday’s child has far to go
Friday’s child is kind and giving
Saturday’s child works hard for a living
Sunday’s child is good and fair and wise and gay
Which does NOT rhyme, what the fuck.
It doesn’t rhyme because you’ve only heard the new politically correct version.
The REAL poem ends,
Saturday’s child works hard for a lay
Sunday’s child is good and fair and wise and gay.
but then FRIDAY’S child doesn’t rhyme, you dope.
how about:
Monday’s child is fair of face
Tuesday’s child is such a waste
Wednesday’s child is full of woe
Thursday’s child has got to go
Friday’s child is always easy
Saturday’s child is a goddamn teasey
Sunday’s child is lemon squeezy
Of course it doesn’t yhme coz you haven’t got Sunday right! It has a couple of its own as below:
The child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is great, and good, and fair, and gay.
There is also another version which ends:
And the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is bonny and blithe and good and gay.
In fact I’ve heard three other versions from a mate who wants to be a paid poet. He re-wrote it 3 times missing out certain letters.
1. No Ls, Bs or Fs:
Monday’s heir has a handsome pate.
Tuesday’s heir does commiserate.
Wednesday’s heir has tears to shed.
Thursday’s heir sees roads ahead.
The next day’s heir is caring and winsome.
Saturday’s heir works hard at his income.
And the heir that arrives on the Day with the Sun
Is a radiant and happy and joyous one.
2. No Es or Vs (the latter to avoid having to leave lines 5 and 6 unchanged from the original):
Monday’s child is fair of skin.
Day Two’s child shrugs off all sin.
Following both, this child is sad.
Thursday’s child’s a trail-blazing lad.
Friday’s child sports a kindly disposition.
For Saturday’s child, salary’s his mission.
And Sunday’s child, on Sabbath born,
Is bonny and mild — not a whit forlorn.
3. Using only the letters that occur in the names of the days of the week: A, D, E, F, H, I, M, N, O, R, S, T, U, W and Y. This eliminates 11 letters: B, C, G, J, K, L, P, Q, V, X and Z.
Monday’s tot is fair of mien.
Tuesday’s tot’s deft deeds are seen.
Wednesday’s tot’s a woesome one.
Thursday’s tot has far to run.
Friday’s tot’s warm ways we admire.
Saturday’s tot has irons in the fire.
And tots that Sunday ushers our way
Are sweet and rosy and radiant, they say.
By the way who are these Wednesday and Thursday guys you are on about? What’s the deal with Wednesday being a humping day? I thought it was Friday/Saturday!
good lord.
that’s um….that’s a lot of poems.
i think we all have one question:
WHO THE FUCK IS TIM SAUNDERS?
(i stole that verbatim from Kristen.)
p.s. not that i’m AGAINST a little tim saunders in the mix. i’m just curious. as to the identity of said tim. and his use of the word ‘mate.’ is he an austrailian saunders? and if so could he set me up with a job with a viable benefit to the continent so i could live there? the CONTINENT, fer fuck’s sake. the whole thing. and me. little. there.
Although the author of this poem is unknown. It is usually attriburted to a quote by B. L. Farjeon in “Harper’s Weekly” (September 17, 1887) and reads as follows:
Monday’s childe is fair of face
Tuesday’s childe is full of grace
Wednesday’s childe is loving and giving
Thursday’s childe works hard for a living
Friday’s childe is full of woe
Saturday’s childe has far to go
But the childe that is born on the Sabbath-day,
Is brave and bonny, and good and gay.
Notice the spellling of child from that time.
Who knows how, when or why Wednesday & Thursday got switched with Friday & Saturday, but I do believe it was subsequent to the original posted above. So you see, Wednesday’s child is NOT full of woe, unless you have some attachment to playing out this part.
Thank heaven’s looked at all the comments as I’ve been trying to find the words to this poem for some time. My newest grandchild was born on a Sunday and I could not remember the words. Thank you, Wendy!