(to continue the gayness discussion….)
a certain miss jenny nessel sent me this test to take:
i am only 45% gay. sigh. i expected to be gayer. this is the picture i got when i reached my percentage score:
so apparently i am also a gay cripple.
erica: question to look forward to equals #62. SQUISHY BOOBS!
i put my fuk_o email address in, so if you want to compare at the end that’s what it is and you can see how likely at that point it is that i’ve had a wet dream about you. jenny has a 12% probability of having had a wet dream about ME. i am pleased by this and am curious as to what my %age is for having had one about her. mainly due to the suspicious fact that i HAVE had a dream about jenny with illicit sexual behaviors going on. sick i know (not because of the gayness but because of the friendness). but what can you do? she’s a pretty girl. hmm who else have i had sex fantasies about…? don’t say erica. because even though there is the porn, i’ve never actually wanted to sleep with erica. sorry erica. mash the mammaries, yes. have sex with, no. but i think i will refrain from naming any more names because this is just wrong. oh so wrong. but take the test. i will compare my wet dream probabilities. it’ll be fun for all.
well i just took the gay female version of the test and it had DIFFERENT QUESTIONS. and i reached 54% gay. i wonder if i took the gay male test if i would reach 75%? anyway my point is: erica, in order to appreciate #62 you have to take the straight girl test. but, of course, take whichever your little heart desires.
hmmm… 50-60% gay depending on what orientation i started with (gayer starting as a lesbitarian). however, 24 is apparently the most gay age, so i guess it’s down-hill from here.
also: the straight woman test made me choose between more friends that are girls, and more that are boys, whereas the lesbo test gave me the third option of equal boy and girl friends… weird.
36% gay here.
29% gay. and i’ve kissed a man AND worn women’s clothing.
i guess that mean’s i’m otherwise profoundly dull.
adam carolla and dr. drew, in their first book, had a gay test and a lesbian test, and they were based on a point system. the more points you get the more gay you are. for example, if you’re a fella, you get 5 points for every candle you own, 10 points for every scented candle you own, and 50 points for every scented candle you own that smells like a man’s ass.
michele, i am exactly as gay as you are. and 20% likely to dream about you, assuming that’s how i should be interpreting the wet dream statistic.
i made big points for the buzz cut, and for the fact that once i pretended to be a lesbian to ditch an unwanted fella. (remember, nuala?)
what!? nuala is a fella?!
No no. I was going to visit kristen in Santa cruz and she was waiting for me outside and some guy started to hit on her so she said she was waiting for her girlfriend (me) and then when I got there she gave me this HUGE hug and was overly excited and I was like “what the hell?!” and then she explained.
So yea I remember. I thought of that when the question came up…hee hee
btw, 29%
Cute story, Nuala and Kristen. If you two had been characters on Ally McBeal you would have had to kiss as well.
Way to go, Marc! People who are 29% gay rock!
I was 24%
Dude, this thing is a crock! I’m only 67% gay (according to the lesbian test). The straight girl test says I’m only 52% gay! What’s up with that??? Guess I’ll have to start giving men their fair 33% of attention! I wonder if my points would go up if there was a question about having your birthday party in a drag bar?
holohan,
29% of me wonders about if 29% of what you said means that you like me, y’know…
nah!
beer. cheerleaders. and french rugby!
Marc,
The original draft of that post read, “We’re 29% gay buddies!” It went through a series of revisions for what I hope are obvious reasons.
mmmm cheerleaders…..
see this is why i am half gay. those spirited short skirts get you every time.
40%, with a bullet.
ahem what i like best now is the people who have a 75% (or more) possibility of having had a wet dream about ME. (sean, jacob, jolie, and marc. and also jenny’s boyfriend in SD.) ha!
nuala = 5%. it doesn’t look good for our relationship on a sexual level i’ve got to say.
it’s silly how entertaining i find these things.
erica what email address did you use to take it?
Odd…It’s only reporting me at 38%. How very homosexual.
as a gay male i am 60% gay.
in the straight male one, one of the questions is: “even though you consider yourself straight, have you ever had sex with another man.” and i had to answer yes. i think this is going to make me pretty gay as a straight male. hoo only 46% gay as a straight male.
well THAT was fun.
48 per fucking cent gay!
woohoo! gay test fun!! michele, I have to say I am flattered…I never knew I was the object of your illicit sexual dreams. It’s touching…hee! I said touching! Jenny’s boyfriend in san diego says he wonders if he would be even more likely to have a wet dream about you if he actually, you know, met you ever. =)
I hate you all. Bisexuals are fake. Suckers. You smell of moose.
it’s tough, isn’t it, james? they like men AND women, and still none of them will sleep with you.
mooooooooooooooooooooooooose.
i’ll take any chance i get to moo.
i scored 86% on the tast.
i invite my best friend robert around and he always flegs on the floor and i lick up his fleg and greenies because i love my friend
i once kissed him, i went to bed with him and i once licked his ass and sucked his dick every time.
I’m sorry, but what the fuck is a “fleg?” I have no idea what this means. It seems to be a verb and a noun, and it is somehow associated with “greenies,” which I am also confused about.
As I think about this, I realize that I don’t want to be enlightened about these words. They scare me. So don’t even try to tell me, cuz I’ll just moo at you.
Frelling fleg!
i’m 44% gay!!! i spose it has to do with the touching of breasteses…
I like having sex but it hurts my pussy when the dick goes inside it. but i like the pleasure of the blow job. Its fun! You people should try sex!
Creepiest….post….EVER.
thank you, kerrigan! what have we been thinking, people? i fel so stupid, i’m going to go out and *try sex* right now!
i tried ovaltine…i tried jazzercise…nothing worked for me until i tried SEX.
there is no try. there is only do, or do not.
well, personally i do sex. but i know people who do not sex and they seem ok.
i know some guy who tried sex. but it didn’t work. he had bad aim.