Categotry Archives: General

in preparation for the upcoming wedding festivities i have been very carefully trying to inveigle my way into being invited to any and all bachelor parties while at the same time providing directions to the best strippers in the respective partys’ neighborhoods. so far it is a no go. first, my cousin is refusing strippers. the best man then also refused my helpful belly dancers suggestion. now they are going fishing. fishing. bah. (not that i wouldn’t go fishing if i was invited. james.) and then brian said he hasn’t done anything for doug’s bachelor party (is this a surprise? doug don’t read this.) and so i urbanely slipped him some helpful links to pictures of strippers in seattle. no reply on that front yet either. it’s like there’s a conspiracy against me getting to see strippers. or play feed the kitty. it’s sexist i tell you. this stupid segregation of genders pre-wedding. i am offended by the archaic male belief systems i keep butting up against with my helpful searching fingers googling the stripper situations.

however my day brightened this morning because yesterday i also sent an email to long-hai in canada begging to know whether he could come see me while i’m in seattle. sadly the answer was no, however he told me about this recent project he did animating an anthropomorphic cat girl and he thought of me for inspiration. ME. all right, i have to say, anyone who uses me as a muse makes me melt inside. that is just too too sweet.

(please note: long-hai drew neither of those pictures. but hopefully will be putting up his animated one eventually on his page.)

last weekend gene was puzzling over how i manage to spend $1500 every month and am always broke, but really it’s not so odd when you consider how much stuff i buy online all the goddamned time. just yesterday i bought another bathing suit. did i need it? not likely. did it cost $100 total with shipping and taxes and everything? all answers point to yes. am i probably going to have to send it back because it doesn’t fit and/or i look terrible in it? most definitely. i’m like a magic eight ball without the surprise.

this morning gene viciously sent me an email with a link to spiky bras. how did he think i could turn down a spiky bra? i could match my backpack. who wouldn’t want that? shit i’m a consumer fiend.

but which kind is better? all black or black and white?

the ferris wheel junkies will spin there forever instead

nuala gave me this magazine upon leaving. like a present. with alyson hannigan on the cover. this magazine’s name? FHM (‘for him magazine.’ what a DUMB name.) and i was going to put up one of the pictures from the edition of the magazine i have. but then i found these other ones from an earlier edition of the magazine while poking around on the fhm site. could wiccan willow be any more sexy?

it’s like that time in superfreaks when i said that katherine heigl is fucking hot. i am totally the 14 yr old girl who’s in love with her favorite tv characters from shows which aren’t coming back next year and who are going to take my virginity without giving me pleasure. bastards. but everything will be all right with a few more pretty pictures. mmmmm….

on saturday when kristen and i were driving home from santa barbara, we pulled over at a rest area to use the, ahem, facilities. and when we got back in the car i was a little tired to start driving right away again so we decided we could rest just a minute before getting back on the road. we got to talking, as we do, and then we thought, since neither of us has REALLY kissed a boy before, we should teach each other how. well, a kiss turned into touching each other, and then we fingered each other and started rubbing against each other, almost causing orgasms. when i see her now, i don’t really think anything of it, but i’ve never said a word (till now)–and neither has she.

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ok so i’m sort of looking for a rapid response to this question from anyone who cares to chime in.

if my boss, who is a bitch, says that my department can’t pay off vacation leave like the rest of the campus does and that instead of working till my last day and then having my vacation time cashed out and ADDED to my paycheck, i have to take the number of vacation days which i have left BEFORE my last day, is it ethical to then say that in addition to the 5 days of vacation leave i’m also going to take my current leftover 4 days of sick leave? this would make my last day next tuesday. what are they going to do if i tell them i’m calling in sick the last 4 days i’m supposed to be working? fire me? whatever bitches. but seriously, how bad of an idea is this? i need opinions other than my angry own.

as most of you know i am going to two weddings this summer. my ex-boyfriend’s and my cousin’s. this is a cause for concern because they are two weeks apart and both in the northwest. the main thing i have to worry about is the clothing options. i love clothes.

both of these weddings are during the day and both are outside-ish. i saw this article today from msn.com and learned that bare shoulders is a no no. HA. what about bare asses people? don’t think i won’t do it. well, ok true i wouldn’t do that. but these shoulders of mine are going to be bare as a baby’s bottom. (yes i will be wrapping huggies around them for the day. crap those are white! i can’t wear white!) and men (ahem jason and jacob ahem) are supposed to wear seer-sucker suits. a great name for a suit. almost as good as six hour sex on the see-saw at the sea-shore. i told that wrong. i should have written it down like kati vol did. =P

anyway as my blue hair with stars stuck in and red and white dress was booed by the masses, i’m not sure what to do next. maybe it’s time to buy that pvc dress i’ve been eyeing. maybe erica and i should make our own costumes–dresses, i mean. dianna, what are YOU going to wear?

will my tried and true method of wearing lingerie to all major functions serve in this situation? i don’t see why not.

when baggity-baggity-o-branny tells you he is bringing Ireland to baseball, he does not fuck around.

kristen is wearing a ring lately of an owl to remind her to be wise and silent. and i found my ring of two people having sex and have been wearing it lately to remind me to be sexual. what does this tell us? that kristen and i place a huge burden upon our jewelery? or that i can’t rhyme? ok i think other things are telling us about my lack of rhyming ability. ahem. mean.