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ellie’s ok.

2 comments

Categories: Uncategorized

for all those who were concerned about ellie being fatally injured last night in baseball:

begin ellie email

hey there button. how you feelin? i am quite fine, just so you know. doing my ellie is clumsy at times and tumbles and bumps her head check in, hate to have to do em but am getting used to them.

this whole new structure of baseball is throwing me way off. i feel like now that we have actual teams and they play well that we now need uniforms and chew. maybe some silly mascot running around trying to make the park tramps cheer for their side, all the while trying not to fall over his big anime eyes and boobs (at this point you are to imagine some overly exagerated anime chick, big pouty eyes and porn star tits like only the anime chicks have, maybe that little white sheen in the hair to imply reflection caused by very healthy shinny hair and studio lights). ahh yeah, the big time baby, we are now in the show.”

end ellie email

i think she has a good point about the mascot. maybe i could volunteer since i think my shins will crack in half if i play baseball one more time.

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film noir

8 comments

Categories: General

ok kiddies, i have an interactive project for us today.

i have to write a scene from a film noir script for my film class, and i am going to enlist all of your help in doing so. mind you this is just for fun and i won’t actually USE it or anything to turn in for my assignment. ahem. cause i’m not a thief or anything.

so this is the required scene set up according to my dumbass teacher (which, mind you, needs a voiceover AND a flashback at some point.):

Scene: Our protagonist, a hardboiled detective down on his luck, is drinking in a bar. A fight between 2 gangstas breaks out in the back. A woman, our femme fatale, tries to break up the fight, but is pushed roughly out of the way by one of them. Our protagonist tries to help her, but the other gangsta throws him hard to the ground. At the sound of police sirens, the gangstas rush from the bar. Our femme fatale helps the detective to his feet and offers to buy him a drink. He reluctantly agrees.

HOWEVER, we do not need to follow this scripted scene AT ALL. feel free to diverge. go wacky. it doesn’t matter.

umm…so i guess i’ll begin then.

film opens on a cloud of smoke, and credits appearing out of the smoke. occasionally glimpses of a woman’s face can be seen, but never too much all at once. sometimes the eyes, or the lips, or a profile in shadows. (we need a good title now…maybe we could decide on it later though.) when the credits end the voiceover begins. i don’t know what the fuck it says though. anyway, the camera zooms in thru the smoke to come out the other side, and the woman blows out her next puff to the side and we see her face in the light fully for the first time. she is gorgeous (obviously) with full pouting red lips, flawless skin, and long shiny hair artfully arranged in that careless windblown look. she is wearing a tight black sheath with a plunging neckline and stiletto heels, which looks very uncomfortable, but she pulls it off effortlessly. the camera pans back a little to reveal that she is ensconced at a bar in a slightly dingy jazz club. light jazz music has been playing all this time, and as the camera angles back a little more to showcase more of the bar dregs, the music picks up a little and sultry female vocals join the band to produce an aurally mesmerizing sound of vocals soaring around and entwining with the instruments that creates a blend of sensual atmosphere to make even the hearing impaired weep. the woman gives a half smile that is so unconsciously sexy that it hurts. and in the background 2 gangstas walk into the bar, see the woman and with with leering faces begin to walk towards her with purposeful strides….

rita2.jpg

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fucking ferrets.

20 comments

Categories: General

the last two days, i’ve been wearing my glasses to work due to the fact that i’m having allergic reactions to everything right now. these are the responses to said glasses:

“michele, i didn’t know you wore glasses!”

“michele, you look so cute in those!”

“are you wearing glasses?”

“you look really good in glasses!”

“are those real?” (bible thumping mary seemed to think i might be trying to make some fashion statement and wearing fake glasses to look cool. which is funny considering how much i hate my glasses, wearing glasses, and how i look in glasses.)

in other news my mother just informed me that my brother is MOVING OUT IN SEPTEMBER. since i am moving back there next month, this means that i will get THREE BEDROOMS OF MY VERY OWN instead of the one very small one. and my own bathroom! and no more nasty ferret stink! but then again also…no more fun boy friends over all the time….and no more funny brother there all the time…but no more nasty girl friends all the fucking time with the using of my shampoo. skanky bitches. but guess who he’s going to live with! corey fucking miller! argh!

ferret.jpg

that ferret is wearing a fleece vest. yes. a fleece vest. just what every ferret needs. click on him to see another ferret. if you care that much about ferrets. are these ferrets friends with the kitten or EATING the kitten?

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