In the final Shadowrun game that Gene hosted he tried to kill all of us and I got drunk and found pretty much everything Adam said to be hilarious. The next day, when I also got drunk, Adam was eying me askance and Rob called me blotto two days after that. Do I have a drinking problem? I haven’t drunk since then. Except, you know, water. And lemonade. Oh, and fascinating coconut water flavored with berries by my fave fruit bar manufacturer, SunRype. Gah, I love them. I love them a little too much lately though because that’s a lot of fiber. Drum cymbal noise. And on that note.
This final game was game day in the game. Game game game. The dogs were racing and a lot of stuff was happening.Mostly concession snack eating. Mostly.
Jacob tried to remind us that it wasn’t all about cotton candy.
Yacob: I do not want five years from now to be killed by a bookie. Now is the time for the serious time. One must make executive decision in this trying time, yes?
This is due to the fact that there’s an unconscious man in the back of his truck who has seen some of our faces and we’re trying to decide what to do about him. Yacob’s solution is clear. The method is unclear.
Emmy: Do you not have a silencer?
Yacob (winking outrageously): No. I make LOUD bang.
Ridge has a knife. Yacob has upholstery fears.
Yacob: Scott! We have knife but no bucket! You break neck.
Eventually the security guard is dead. It’s amazing how long it took to happen though. If I had been there…
End of that scene:
Yacob: I go, I suppose, loiter.
Smoky: Loiter….Murder….Eh.
Scott: We’re an all or nothing crew.
So then we’re still kind of waiting for shit to happen, right? Actually, I guess some of us are in a firefight at the bookie building. But Scott and Ridge are just hanging out.
Scott to Ridge: You wanna go get a hot dog or a fro-yo or something? I like that I’m in a tux and eating a corn dog.
Then Yacob and Alfred are both shot. But heaven forbid some mustard gets on the suit. Roll for stains.
I’m not sure how this was going to come in handy, but…
Scott: I have Matrix theory.
Emmy: Matrix fury?
Scott: That would be better. Matrix fury. In theory.
Emmy: (laughing hysterically. Hey. Drunk, here.)
Oh, it might have had to do with the computer hacking plan. Or the sniper on the roof circumnavigating the surveillance cameras plan. Anyway, in theory, he should have also known what eating eight corn dogs would do.
Scott: I am vomiting up corn dogs in the corner.
But in theory doesn’t apply to Scott’s relationship with food. I’m pretty sure I am narrowly escaping death at this point from a stupid magician who spelled me.
Scott: Every so often, I reach up and pick a piece of funnel cake and eat it. Brush off the powder sugar. Wouldn’t want to dirty my suit. It’s a hard life.
I’m unconscious. Gene is checking what the players are doing.
GM: You’re at serious (Emmy). You’re at medium (Alfred and Yacob). Everyone else is fine, right?
Scott: I feel a little bloated from the corn dogs.
GM: Roll for bloat.
This stupid magician falling from the sky (jumped out of a plane) is bugging everyone. Yacob has a plan to shoot him but is waiting for him to come into range while I’m unconscious and Ridge is on fire. Possibly Alfred is also unconscious.
Scott: You’re going to be so upset when he turns out to be Bob Hope.
Yes, we really are.
At the end, Yacob did shoot the magician. We all survived. We protected the one dog from the magician. And we fixed the race (in (matrix) theory. At least we got the hacker in and out). But we didn’t re-kidnap the pretty dog for the lady who hired us. And it was midnight. So we gave up.
Yacob: We can crush a woman’s hope and dreams.
The End.
Oh, NOD. I have been finding Jacob’s character hysterical from the moment he described him to me. I wish I could have sat in on that whole game but in fast forward (to skip the parts with dice).