for those of you wondering what anderson happens to be doing with his time. go check out his new band’s webpage at :
for those of you not wondering what the sperm whale happens to be doing with his time. well for you i reserve my pity. and my scorn. because i’m mean like that.
ok so this weekend i got tattooed, poison oaked, and had a fantabuloous time (minus the nuala losing her purse section) at kristen’s bday bash. i like to boogey. i like to get down. go-go girls in men’s white briefs, legwarmers, and wife-beaters can not be beaten. 26 mix you are the bomb-diggity of my world. HOWever, and i cannot stress this point enough, playing pool with strangers is not my cup of tea. first off: do i like strangers? no! i loathe strangers! am i socially outgoing? no! i am a reclusive clam! and then to top it off i lost to him! i do not like losing, sam i am. admittedly at no point did i actually have to pay to play pool. and i did at least beat a certain fancy pants. though possibly that is more due to the fact the i “sank” one of my balls by hand and circumvented losing the 8 ball in the middle of the game by a judicious use of the palm in the pocket technique. shit, i am totally a cheater. why do you people even acknowledge me? more the fool you.
thinking back (ah memory lane) i cannot even recollect when i first started cheating. perhaps it was in high school when i would stack the deuces deck for whichever boy i happened to be feeling beneficial towards at the time. generally this seemed to be adam. damn him and his ability to toy with my affections. but occasionally it would be jimmy if he was making me laugh. or jason if i was copying his physics homework on the sly. or long-hai if he was promising to give me free airheads or cool artwork. (i am going to find aforementioned art and post it. because eventually that boy is going to be famous and i want to feel securely attached to the illustrious coat tails.) but maybe it was when i was like 5 and my grandmother (father’s) taught me to play rummy, or when i was 6 and my dad taught me to play cribbage, or when i was 7 and the family (mom’s) taught me to play pinochole. hmmm….but morally upright child that i am, i cannot for the life of me remember EVER cheating when playing against my family, (brother does not count). i save it all for you, dear friends. dear, dear easily flummoxed friends.
that’s funny, because I remember you telling me how you learned poker by cheating all your relatives at xmas when they got stinking drunk and you were perfumedly sober.
hmmm…..interesting. well….i think i didn’t cheat so much as i just kicked thier respective drunk asses. and i suppose that can be considered cheating if i am NOT drunk and they are all VERY drunk. but really i think that’s just clever thinking on my part. and not cheating thinking. i like to justify myself to myself. besides i learned how to play poker when i was still crawling. you can’t really expect me to have been drinking back then. i couldn’t even chew solid foods, let alone slam down beers.
my leetle chubby hands are too small. they do not have the gripping power of prehensile monkey toes even.
I have long hai artwork and do you know from where? the literary magazine. That’s right I still have it. Scream in fear.
hoo lord yes. me throw that away? are you kidding? after all my hard work (in ousting amanda from The Trio so that i could finally take her place as the best friend of you and michele)?
and me editing that goddamm thing and going to all those paper stores to get pretty samples of paper so we could choose what we wanted to print it on. i even still have some of THAT paper.
but i also have an entire folder of long-hai and adam artwork drawn thru the years in welsh classes and at lunch and in physics and in biology and probably even in hagar’s.
I still have many issues of The Prowler, including the super-extended Dr. Demented special edition, which features much Long-Hai artwork, but not, regrettably, the panel of Mr. Ezidro urinating on a locker.
holy crap! sean you are brilliant. i had totally forgotten about dr. demented. you should scan that shit right on in. or if you have no scanner, i will scan it for you. hmmmm you live with gene. you must have a scanner.
when long-hai was last in town (like 2 weeks ago) him and jason (fong, aka big j pony) came over and we watched the 8th grade video yearbook. i damned ezidro to hell once again. cursed his name and his hairy, white, scrawny legs. as well as his predilection for peeing on lockers.
I want to see evidence of this “Pleasant Hill Renaissance” – do you guys have poetry and stuff in it? Maybe at the party, Sean, you can bust that shit out. Reading! Reading! I’ll bring the cheese and apples if you provide the wine.
i’ve probably shown it to you before. well not the middle school NEWSPAPER. but the other thing. the lit mags. i am totally up for some middle school reading this weekend though. it’s up to you to make all our dreams come true, sean.
ahem.
big j pony?
hwee. his email address his bigjfong. why? i don’t know. but with his handwriting being as it is i thought it said bigjpony. and long-hai and i had quite a chuckle. so i think you can understand how it’s a newly cleft moniker.