Nyotaimori

yesterday i went for an interview. i just got a phone call offering me the job. i don’t even want a job! why did i say i was still interested? why? i could be jobless, free, and unfettered. no one else in my family has a job. my mom doesn’t care. but what if i turn down this job and then i can’t get another job for months? i have no skills. it’s not like i’m good at anything in particular.

let me tell you a little about this job. it’s working for a wholesale book distributor in the bay area (located in oakland by the airport and coliseum) doing customer service (phones) and data entry of orders. this is not glamorous. pay is minimal and it is far away from where i live. but there is a cat which lives there and lots of pretty books to look at and the potential for interesting co-workers. there’s no dress code, my hair can be as crazy as i like, and did i mention the on-site cat? it doesn’t seem like demanding or responsiblity driven work. but i am not sure if the computers are hooked up to the internet. which could pose a serious problem to my getting thru each day. wait…they have a webpage and email addresses…they must have internet. hmm well that is one concern eliminated. i could have health benefits again and money for all my expensive habits.

but working in oakland….for $9/hour….these are crazy intense drawbacks.

ahem. for those of you not as concerned about my personal safety as kristen, i submit this article for your perusal. in which you can read a stunning tale of a parolee on the lam, chased by cops to my neighborhood, breaking into houses, hitting the residents in the face (this actually learned by second hand sighted info), pointing a gun at them, stealing their car, trashing the neighbors across the streets fence, and then being shot by cops and taken to the hospital.

the fact that no info is given out about him–his condition, his name, his crime–is a little weird. the fact that my mom was home alone and could have been taken hostage is terrifying. but i will be blase and say that since nothing did happen to her there’s no use worrying retrospectively. but inside i will be screaming, “mommy! mommy!”

there’s still newsvans there. and cops were being all csi until 7 this morning. and there’s blood on the street. things like this shouldn’t happen in suburbia. which i know is a terribly stupid and naive thing to say. but come on, not MY suburbia.

i feel this is going to be inane. which is i suppose what i get when i’m this tired and still kind of reeling from the number of things i’ve done in the past week.

last wednesday i began driving with jacob and dianna up to doug and lisa’s wedding in WA. we stopped at their house on the way up and saw what a gorgeous family residence they have. 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lovely leather furniture, huge backyard, multitudes of plants, and intense croquet games. that house was MADE to raise children in. even if right now they’re using the extra bedrooms as “offices.” and let me tell you, it is weird to see pictures of your ex-boyfriend and his fiancee all over his desk when it used to have framed photos of you on it.

but the strangeness of the weekend was only beginning. being in tacoma and at UPS again was freakish. i could not manage to explain to anyone however why it was so bizarre in a bad way. i tried describing how depressing it felt to be back somewhere which hasn’t changed but in which you no longer belong AT ALL. but that didn’t seem to fly really well. it was like looking around at a place where i used to walk and laugh and be and now i am a completely different me who no longer gets to walk to class along the paths like she owned them, or run into people sitting in front of the SUB with glad cries of welcome and bon homie, or even have homework to do. my mind doesn’t even work the same way it used to. and being there again just made the differences which i am currently not so fond of more profound.

friday we picked up erica and jason at the airport and went back to campus. but we didn’t stay nearly as long this time and then we got to go to happy dragon, the best restaurant ever. man i love them so much. the gimp was even there and faked remembering us out of a chided sense of compassion. it was beautiful.

and then friday night we drove up to seattle to see anderson and his new band chuckanuut drive play. for those of you who have not heard me and/or erica speak of anderson, our love for him is intense, full of rivalry, and lasting. it is absurd how great this boy is. seriously. so we’re lurking around looking for him and we find him then and he is all with the washington hickish alt boy look. he’s rebuilt a 1968 mustang. he’s gotten arm muscles. he’s better then ever before. erica and i are swooning. and then what does he do while we watch fireworks across the sound from gasworks park? he stands behind me and is all sweet and cuddly while inwardly i’m screaming, “yes! yes!” and erica is looking on with a jealous but concurrently delighted face. but then he has to go set up for the band and when we get back to the bar he comes and sits with us and launches into talking about his girlfriend who has the flu and is oh so wonderful and blah blah blah. it was so upsetting. but he showed us a picture and she is gorgeous and he is so adorably into her that you can’t actually blame him. (fucking can too blame him. fucking cock-tease. fucking argh.)

chuckanut drive=great live. and the two main front guys (guitars and vocals) were awesome. and very nice too. even though erica kept telling them to take their clothes off. and then i got carried away and asked them to take their clothes off, slap each around a little with their cowboy belts, and make-out on stage. seriously though, they were hot. one of them is getting married this month too. crazy month of weddings.

saturday we got up late, rushed around like crazy, got dressed and went to the church. which we got to just in time. immediately running into doug’s mom who was so giggly nervous and excited. she hugged me and was so happy to see us all there while we signed the guestbook and people stared at us. cause we were all so snazzy. and i have a lot of multi-colored hair.

the wedding was nice. it was very small and sweet and full of religiosity. whoo. lots of father son and holy spirits amen. and seeing people our age up there being stressed to about the foreverness of this and the holy sacrosanct of marriage and the binding laws etc was kind of intimidating. but, hey, more power to those who choose this and go thru with it and MEAN it, ey? admittedly it was also fun clutching erica’s hand, death grip on jason’s knee, unable to wipe the grin off my face, and carefully trying not to look at the snickering face of the best man which kept setting me off into snickers too. i shouldn’t be allowed at weddings really. i have no sense of decorum.

the reception afterwards was full of chatting and schmoozing. i did no actual schmoozing. jacob looked slick enough to schmooze, but also seemed to avoid doing it. we basically had a little enclave and fought tooth and nail when drug out of it. take, for example, the bridal bouquet toss where we all attempted to pretend marriage. i grabbed jason, erica held onto brian for dear life, and dianna mutinously refused to let go of jacob. sadly the groom’s mother saw us hiding and forced us out on the grass where i quickly drug erica to the back of the group of girls and refused to go any closer to the dreaded flowery death sentence. fucking wedding traditions. fucking stupid. amy, (doug’s younger sister) caught it and we all breathed a healthy sigh of relief while we in turn mocked and goaded the boys out for the garter toss. jason refused to dive for it, for which i might never forgive him. the brother of the bride caught it on the second attempt. hi-larious.

sunday we hung out in seattle with brian (best man) eating at nasai and shopping. we then dumped jason at the airport and went to tacoma again to meet up with susan, karl, and brenden who we all went to school with. which was oh so great! it was so much fun seeing them all again. they’re all younger by 1-2 years then us but are an awesome group of people who we associated with while at school. they told us about this movie they’d seen which i am now getting and once i have it i think we should all watch it. maybe it will be brilliant. it certainly sounded brilliant from their descriptions.

monday and tuesday were spent driving home with a brief interlude at powell’s in portland where i bought way too many books. man i love books. i’ve got almost a complete set of margaret mahy books now and a first american edition of rushdie’s jaguar smile

pictures should be up sometime soon. i’ve got two rolls. it’s amazing as usual how few pictures of me there are. and no real good ones of the lovely dress my mom made for me. although i got several compliments on it, (though not nearly as many as i got on the hair over the course of the weekend. shit, i fucking love this hair.)

and that concludes this hell of long post. if you actually read it all i thank and congratulate you. if you did not suffer thru all my descriptions…well…whatever. you can look at pictures later.

holy canoodle. so a while ago (2 weeks or so) gene called me and made me all nervous by telling me he had to read me something. i was a little panicky because it turned out to be from an employee of the sugar shoes company and i was sure i was going to be sued. but happiness ensued rather because in fact they were trying to contact me to give me FREE THINGS because i have been advertising and drawing business for them. i was ecstatic, you can imagine. free sugar products? hell yeah, bring it on. i was expecting one of their free necklaces. maybe a little makeup sample or something. but then they asked for my shoe size. FREE SUGAR SHOES IN THE OFFING. i almost expired from joy. i mean, who manages to get free products because of their webpage? this is definitely a first for me. a first i intend to replicate somehow. you wouldn’t think it would get much better than free shoes though, right? but that’s where you’d be wrong.

i got home today from my adventures in the pacific northwest, (more to follow), to find a big ass sugar shoes box waiting for me in my room. i excitedly ripped it open to find:

free magnet (1)

free stickers (about 6)

free makeup (3 kinds)

free sugar purse/bag (1)

AND FREE LIGHT UP SUGAR SHOES.

THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER. THE BEST PRESENT FILLED DAY OF FREE SUGAR.

sugar is sweet and so are you. but not as sweet as my twinkle toed shoes.

ellie. is. pregnant. pregnant. preggers. having a baby. bun in the oven. conceived. gonna be a momma. holy fucking shit.

she told me. i kind of went to pieces. i am still kind of in shock. it is completely surreal. she’s my friend. my pregnant friend. i had a huge crush on her and tried really hard to get her to go out with me before being turned down on a bjork e-card. long story. anyway. now she’s pregnant. and moving to canada (in december). canada. baby canook. it’s going to say “aboot” and “dood” and MEAN it.

i can’t even imagine being pregnant. but she’s happy. really, really happy. next time you see her you can say “congrats, dood.” but no hardball with the pregnant woman. tag ball rule not allowed anymore, she gets special treatment.

mostly i’m sad that she’s going to be moving away. and so far! i mean it’s great for her because she’ll be a lot closer to her dad and she really loves vancouver. but still! so far…

pregnant, PREGNANT. shit.

erica and i stand around lathering our breasts with suntan lotion.

me: let’s make out.

erica: ok. let me just take my top off.

pause

erica: ha ha ha silly me it’s already off.

michele: oh erica, that’s a boob slapping good time.

we commence to slapping our boobs.

later…

erica and i are spreading more sunscreen on our sensitive chest regions.

michele (while carefully avoiding looking): it’s funny how not weird this is.

erica (carefully turns partially away so as not to be looking and not be able to be looked at): yeah. but i’ve known you like what, 6 years?, and it’s like whatever. they’re just our breasts.

michele: yeah. 6 years. wow.

erica: i don’t think i could really do this with anyone else though.

michele: well except for that time with kristen, jacob, and jason.

erica: well…yeah.

later…

michele (carefully keeping only the head above water): weightless, unemcumbered breast swimming stroke feels funny.

erica (giggles and flips over so she is lying on her chest): yeah.